The End and the Beginning

So, it is a fairly well-known fact that humans fear death. To elaborate, I'll be citing Wikipedia (my favorite!):

" Psychologists have addressed the hypothesis that fear of death motivates religious commitment, and that it may be alleviated by assurances about an afterlife. Empirical research on this topic has been equivocal. According to Kahoe and Dunn, people who are most firm in their faith and attend religious services weekly are the least afraid of dying. People who hold a loose religious faith are the most anxious, and people who are not religious are intermediate in their fear of death. A survey of people in various Christian denominations showed a positive correlation between fear of death and dogmatic adherence to religious doctrine. In other words, Christian fundamentalism and other strict interpretations of the Bible are associated with greater fear of death. Furthermore, some religious orientations were more effective than others in allaying that fear.^[9]

In another study, data from a sample of white, Christian men and women were used to test the hypothesis that traditional, church-centered religiousness and de-institutionalized spiritual seeking are distinct ways of approaching fear of death in old age. Both religiousness and spirituality were related to positive psychosocial functioning, but only church-centered religiousness protected subjects against the fear of death.^[10]

Fear of death is also known as death anxiety. This may be a more accurate label because, like other anxieties, the emotional state in question is long lasting and not typically linked to a specific stimulus. The analysis of fear of death, death anxiety, and concerns over mortality is an important feature of existentialism and terror management theory. "

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fear#Fear_and_death

Now, I would argue that the fear of death referred to applies not only to death (although, obviously that is our biggest fear), but also to the end of all good things.
This trip has been, for me, one of the biggest times of growth in my life, ever. I honestly cannot think of any other time in my life when I have changed so much in such a short span of time. It would be natural, then, for me to fear the end. I fear having to go home, to return to society, to return to morbidly obese, self-obsessed, Midwest America (I have so much pride for my country!). It just doesn't sound too appealing. I feel like while I've been here, everything is so surreal. It's like I don't live in reality anymore, I'm just stuck in this semi-virtual-reality-do-whatever-you-want-This-is-Africa world thing. Ultimately, I think that my greatest fear is returning to the real world, where I have real classes, and real money, and a real life. Doesn't sound so great, does it? In addition, we all have a fear of the unknown, and my life after this is pretty unknown. How am I going to reintegrate into society? How will this fit into my relationship? Who am I going to hang out with now? Clearly, I have more questions than answers.

So, I'm talking to my friend Suzy (one of the spring semester students who decided to stay during the summer; I'm currently sleeping in her old bed), and I'm telling her how sad it is that I have to leave. Not only sad, but frustrating. There's still so much I want to do! There's still so much I want to see and learn and experience. But there's just no time. So, instead of encouraging my tragedy, she gives me some of the best advice I've ever heard. She says (and this is paraphrased), "Don't be sad that you have to leave, just be thankful that you got the opportunity to come and live in this amazing place. Not many people get that change." Now, that may seem way too cheerful for my attitude, but I actually took it to heart (obviously, I'm writing about it right now). For some reason, this advice has really stuck with me and I've actually managed to apply it to other parts of my life. So, I'm not really sure where this is going, I just thought I'd share that gem with you all. Don't worry, I'm not suddenly going to turn into Little Miss Sunshine over here (although I do love that movie!), I'm just saying maybe it's time for a bit of a fresh perspective.

Sincerely,

Jason

Things Notre Dame Students Like #24: Forming Small Circles

" Whether at bars, parties, tailgates, classroom buildings or just hanging out in dorms, Notre Dame Students love to form small circles. These small circles are critical to the Notre Dame social scene not only for their functional practicality, but also because of what their existence tells other people.

While small circles can be seen almost anywhere, the most common place to see small circles is at bars. The Backer, Finnegan’s, Fever, and Corby’s are all places where small circles are frequently seen. Small circles are important at bars because they allow the Students to talk to each of their friends despite the loud songs, and also allow the students to more effectively sing the choruses of said loud songs as opposed to awkwardly standing alone. Small circles are especially critical for certain songs, such as God Bless the USA and Piano Man, so that Students can put their arms around each other and sway to the music.

Small circles are also important for their ramifications on the Notre Dame social scene. You can tell a lot about a person by what small circle they are a part of. While Notre Dame Students are inherently uncool, you discover things about the crowd a person rolls with by looking at the members of their small circles. Small circles are most readily formed by people who went abroad together, people that play in the marching band together, people who lived in dorms together, and people who served on student government committees together. A Notre Dame Student will quickly know if they can join a small circle just by the people who are in it.

Small circles are important to the Notre Dame social scene because they facilitate the notion of the group. If a Notre Dame Student wants to enter into a long-term relationship with another Notre Dame Student, the obvious first step is to enter into a small circle with them. The small circle is the first step in any good Notre Dame relationship, or even any Notre Dame friendship, and it should not be forgotten. "

http://www.thingsnotredamestudentslike.com/

Clearly, small social groups (circles, as bob likes to call them) are critical to the existence of Notre Dame students. If one does not have a group, then he is a social outcast. Incoming freshman fret not finding a group and will do anything to be a part of one, even if they have very little in common with other group members. Students will skip meals to avoid having to go to the dining hall alone and possibly encounter an awkward situation. It is as if the university teaches dependence on a group, rejecting any value associated with independence.

Now, as bob mentions, one of the groups that forms is the group of students who travel abroad together. Certainly, we are no exception. Although our program is only six weeks long, I have no doubt that we will continue to hang out with some regularity if not frequency, once we return to South Bend. I have no objection, quite the opposite, in fact. I quite look forward to seeing everyone on campus and loudly shouting "WYNBERG!!!!!!" to Mary as she walks toward DeBart. What I don't like, however, is the necessity of people to stay in groups while in Cape Town. It's like people have to get a threesome together just to walk the four blocks to Pick 'N Pay. Now, I recognize that it's different because I'm a boy so I have fewer safety issues to deal with, but is it really that scary to walk four blocks in a decent area in broad daylight? Perhaps I'm too judgmental (ok, I'm definitely too judgmental).

So, excuse me for wanting to break out. It's not that I've become antisocial, just frustrated. For example, one day for lunch I go to Kuaii for lunch (chicken caesar salad = heaven) and to read some more of Me Talk Pretty One Day. So, I finish lunch and walk back to class and arrive a few minutes early. I sit down and listen to music and a few minutes later Molly and the typical gang walk in. She asks what I'm doing there by myself, I answer, and it's like she's looking at an alien. Why am I suddenly seen as the weirdest person ever? For wanting to be alone. Now, I consider myself a very social and sociable person, but sometimes I just want time alone. When I'm alone, I can actually think, I can reflect, and I notice things that I wouldn't normally. I can take time to stare at the clouds without holding people up and I can go wherever I want whenever I want and I don't have to consider others. So call me selfish. I will be the first to admit that a.) I'm pretty easy to live with (I hope) and b.) I quickly get annoyed when being with people too much. It's not that I'm difficult to live with, but more so that it's difficult to live with me (if that makes any sense). Naturally, after living with people for six weeks, going to class with them, and going out with them every night, you start noticing the little things. Well maybe I'm just extra observant because it only took me 3 weeks to start picking them out (yes, I'm a bitch).

So, I decided that instead of whining I should actually do something. This weekend I went to Muizenberg beach all by myself (*pats myself on back*). Let me tell you, it was great, in a very strange sort of way. I'm still getting used to the whole alone in public thing so it definitely felt strange as I watched families, friends, and partners playing in the sand while I sat there reading my book, but it was a good weird. I enjoyed just sitting there and watching the tide roll in. I enjoyed looking out into the infinite sea and seeing no end beyond the horizon. I actually enjoyed being alone.
So, here's to independence! The next time you see me, I may just be alone, reading a book, or staring at the sky.

Sincerely,

Jason

Would You Rather...

So, it would seem as if one of the many reoccurring themes of my summer would be cheating; no, not cheating on a test (although that will probably be the topic of another post), but cheating on one's boyfriend/girlfriend/partner/boo baby/etc. Now, don't go jumping to any conclusions! The issue actually arose at the very beginning of the summer when two of my close friends were involved in relationships where someone had allegedly cheated. Of course there was suspicion, accusation, fighting, loss of friends, and all of the really horrible events that accompany cheating; however, it seemed that what no one could agree upon was what cheating was exactly. No one could give a precise definition, and if they tried they certainly couldn't come to an agreement with anyone else. Everyone seems to have their own ideas and preconceptions. So there I am, trying to be mediator in a situation of which I only know one side. Of course I want to tell my friend that what she did wasn't cheating and that everyone else is just being a bitch, but come on, a home wrecker's a home wrecker no matter what term you prefer. And naturally I want to tell a friend that what she did is acceptable because in her head the relationship was over, but guess what hunny, it wasn't over! So where does one draw the line? Is it with a kiss? Making out? Having sex (there's a whole other definition to fight over)? And what about dating someone else while not getting physical? When does it go from a friendly dinner to a date? When are they too close? I fear I may be asking questions that have no answer.

The ultimate tragedy, I feel, is that not only are relationships ended by suspicion taken too far, but entire groups of friends are torn apart. People feel the need to choose sides, that they must believe their friend simply because she's their friend, as if he or she could never mess up. They choose sides based on one perspective, rarely hearing both sides of the argument. They choose sides and by doing so divorce themselves from opposing parties, ending possibly decade-long friendships over a simple yet exaggerated break-up.

So, where do I fit into all of this? Well, this summer has been the first time that cheating has ever been an option. Yes, I've been in a relationship for 8 months, but this is the first time I've ever been in a relationship and been away from my boyfriend. To put it plainly, this is the first time that temptation has ever been, well, tempting. So, here I am in Cape Town, aka hookup central, trying to figure out what cheating is, what cheating isn't, and how to know the difference. My intention is not to go as far as I can without crossing the line; it's just that I'm confused! So, I've began asking around. Asking people who are in relationships, who've broken up, who've cheated and who've been cheated on. I ask, "what is cheating?," "If your signifcant other cheated, would you want to know?," "If you found out he/she cheated, would you want to know?," and on and on. I've found that in this case results may vary and rather drastically. So, I took it to class and allowed Anre to mediate.

I was a little surprised at how passionate people were on the issue. Some because they had been cheated on themselves, and others, I would imagine, because they've thought a lot about it. So, he asks the class if we were to cheat, would we tell our significant other if we knew that it would end the relationship immediately. 12 out of 14 of us raised their hands. Unsurprisingly, I was one of the two not to. Now, before you assume I'm a cheating skank, let me explain. I'd love to be the first person to say that if I ever cheated I would immediately call home and confess, but I can't say that because I've never been in that situation. It's easy to say that you'd do the right thing, but it's often incredibly difficult to actually do it. [on a side note, this reminds me of a conversation we had at Kruger regarding abortion when one of the girls said that they could never do it, and another responded by asking if she'd ever had a pregnancy scare. let me just say that it puts things into perspective pretty quickly] So, there I was looking like a cheating whore, as the class pass judgment (really though, I'm pretty sure it would be the first or even the hundredth time they passed judgment on me so at this point what have I got to lose?) and I try to explain myself in the oncoming barrage of glares and stares. Finally, I make my point that unless someone had in fact cheated before, they really had no place to be raising their hand. Well, that didn't change many minds, but at least I got my point out there. My favorite comment, however, was when one girl (I'll let you guess who) mentioned that she would tell her boyfriend, but she would play it off like it somehow wasn't her fault. No comment.

So, then came the next question; "If your significant other cheated on you, would you want to know?" This time the response was a little more mixed, as about half raised their hands and half did not. Here, we actually some valid candidates for experience-based discussion. We had at least two girls who had been cheated on in the past, but handled it very differently. The first immediately broke up with her boyfriend and they've been on rocky terms, even as friends, ever since. The second also broke up, but within two weeks they were back together and they are still together to this day. So, who's right? Again, this reflects the different personalities apparent in the class, and also reveals the great disparity between men and women. The first girl is more conservative and openly admits to being a very jealous woman. The second is more liberal, open, and just very good at accepting whatever life brings her. I would hope to be more to the second, but we are all jaded when it comes to analyzing our own personalities. The real question, I would argue, is who's happier?

Anre followed up by asking the reasons why they broke up immediately, and everyone agreed (for once) that it was due to a lack of trust. He had broken the trust that the relationship was based on, so without it there could be no relationship. Of course, the inevitable debate followed as to whether the trust could ever be restored, and if it could, what action or event would have to take place for restoration to occur. Pretty unsurprisingly, the first argued that no, once it is broken, it could never be restored, while the second thought that it could (and apparently has been).

I'm honestly not quite sure where I stand on this issue. I think that trust can always be restored, but both parties have to want it, and it will rarely come easily. Another really fantastic comment came from a girl who said that trust could be restored partially, but not fully, say maybe 93% (yes, that is what she said. yes, it was actually that arbitrary). So, Anre rebuts that, in his opinion, you either trust someone, or you don't; it's all or nothing and can't be in between. This is another point that I'm not quite sure I agree with. I think that there are levels of trust between two people. For example, I may trust an acquaintance with watching my things while I go to the bathroom, but I wouldn't necessarily trust them to hold all of my secrets. So, in this regard, I think that there are levels of trust. I also think that there is a minimum level of trust necessary for a romantic relationship to be functional. So, in that respect, I suppose it is all or nothing. So what if I trust someone, but not to the point of getting romantically involved again? I guess that was, in some way, Anre's point, it simply won't work.

I also think that the level of offense plays a huge part in how trust is restored. Did he drunkenly hook up at a club? Or did he repeatedly go on dates behind my back? To be honestly, I think I could fairly quickly overlook a drunken make out. I mean, I'm not going to act like I'm not a horny teenager who hasn't seen his boyfriend in two months. I am. And I know how easy it can be to go from drunkenly dancing with someone to drunkenly making out in a split second. It just happens. I'm not saying that it's excusable, just that I can understand, and I'm not saying that trust wouldn't be broken, just that it would be easier to restore. On the other hand, if someone were to go behind my back and go on dates, that would be a completely different issue. I think that the difference lies in intent. If someone makes out, the intent is to do something that's instantly gratifying because they're drunk and dumb enough to not know the difference. I get that. If someone is actively dating another, then clearly they aren't emotionally satisfied with our current relationship, and are looking to make up for that lack of satisfaction by fleeing to the arms of someone else. That's a problem. I would hope that they would be able to talk to me about it and either decide that we need to work it out or break it off, but going behind my back like that would be a complete loss of trust that would take a lot to fix.

So, would I want to know if he cheated? I really can't say, and honestly it doesn't matter, because I'm either going to find out or not, and my desire to know or not to know probably won't make any difference. So yeah, I'd like to say that I would want to know, but as they say, ignorance is bliss.
So there's my brief analysis lol.

Sincerely,

Jason

Yeah, Brad Pitt Did That

So, I know that I haven't blogged in a long time. Blogger has been really finicky, so I apologize. Anyways, I'm probably going to start making my posts on here shorter, because I really really really need to start journaling more on [side notes]. Yesterday, we went shark cage diving, and it was probably one of the coolest and scariest things I have ever done. We got picked up at 5:50am (shame!!!!) and then driven two hours away to a coastal town called Gansbaii. There, we got breakfast and a quick safety schpiel(sp?) and then headed onto the boat. 13 of us went, and there were only 3 other guys doing it with us along with the crew. We went out to an island about 25 minutes away and we anchored a few hundred feet away. Off the coast of the island, which itself is a bird sanctuary, there is a massive rock that is home to about 50-60,000 seals. So, the sharks don't actually live there, but that gives them 60,000 reasons to come visit. In fact, the narrow straight between the island and the rock is called "shark alley" and over 70% of all shark documentaries are shot there. Anyways, as we headed to our anchor spot they let out a chum trail (sounds appetizing, no?) to attract the sharks and then set the cage into the water on the side of the boat. The cage is basically a large rectangle thats roughly 8 feet tall, 2 and a half feet wide, and just long enough for six people to stand shoulder to shoulder. So, once we all slip into wetsuits (not flattering for anyone's figure, unless you're Brad Pitt), they told us that the first shark had approached the boat. Now, it's not like jaws where you see the triangular fin above water headed right towards the boat. Rather, you keep an eye out for a large shadowy figure just beneath the surface. Once the first shark approached (all Great White sharks by the way), the dive master grabbed the first six to get in the cage (I was number 3). There is no dive experience necessary, because its not SCUBA or even snorkeling. Rather, six of you squeeze into the cage, all facing out, with your heads above water. Then, as the shark is about to swim by, the dive master screams, and we all go down to take a look. In addition to the chum line, they have a huge tuna head (larger than my own head) on a rope that use as bait. So, the shark approaches, and they use the bait to get it to come near the cage, and distract the shark so as not to attack the cage. I actually didn't think it was particularly freightening watching the shark go by, because there is a steel cage in front of you, but once it turned and was coming straight at us, I definitely felt my heart stop. It never bit the cage (although it has in the past), but it did bump against it a few times. We were in the cage for about 20 mins. each time (everyone got to go twice) and the entire day we saw somewhere between 7 and 10 different sharks, the largest being 5 meters long (about 16.5 ft.) and weighing 5 tons! I actually thought it was scarier watching the sharks from the boat, because on occassion the shark would pop out of the water jaws-style in order to get the bait, and that definitely scared the shit out of me. I didn't personally take any photos, but some of the others did and I have to say that not even Universal Studios could capture this kind of stuff. Anyways, we all got out alive, and with all of our limbs (you did have to be careful not to let your foot slip out the back of the cage!) and made it home safely. What we did learn, though, was that the company we used has also hosted Prince Henry, Matt Damon, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Brad Pitt (one of the few things Missouri actually has to be proud of).
Today, we had an 8-10 page paper due (really, we're in Africa, why are we doing work???), and tonight I believe we're going to an improv comedy night, which will hopefully be good, you never know with open mics. Anyways, I'll try to be updating everyone more consistently. I recently posted some pics from the safari on Facebook, but the internet here is not free, so I'll have to keep photos to a minimum. Tomorrow, it's class again (hooray!).

Till then,

Jason

Procrastination? What Procrastination?

So, I am well aware of the fact that this post is waaaaaaaaaay overdue, and that I probably should have started journaling three weeks ago, but thus is life and thus is the life of a chronic procrastinator. For me, one of the most intimidating things about journaling is twofold:
a) I never know where to start
b) My mind is running at roughly 5 trillion thoughts per second, so writing them down isn't always the easiest thing for me to do.
For the sake of anyone reading this (if there even is anyone reading this), and for my own sake when I hopefully come back and read this later, I will try to stay somewhat on track. Nonetheless, I simply ask that you bear with me as I try to sort through the many things my mind is telling me.
Like I said on my other blog, Notes on Contemplation, [side notes] is a much more private journal. Obviously, I am making it available to be read by anyone, but I hope that you take a much more serious approach to what I have to say. The thoughts that are inside my head are not always expressed, often remaining hidden, buried deep in the web of ideas that make up my mind. I am going to use [side notes] to try to sort through that web and bring some of those thoughts to the surface. You may not always agree, or even understand what I have to say. Some of my be shocking, some of it may be offensive, and some of it may tempt you to judge me rather harshly. I simply ask that you have an open mind and an open heart while reading this. In life, I try to take a more critical view when examining things. That doesn't necessarily mean that I am trying to criticize, only that I what to see things for what they truly are, if that is even possible. If you have any questions about something, by all means ask me. I want this journal to encourage thoughts and reflections on behalf of those who read it, whether you agree with what I think or not. If that doesn't sound like something your interested in, then I kindly ask that you not read [side notes]. I will continue posting on Notes on Contemplation with a rough outline of my activities, so don't feel like you're missing out. [side notes] is something different, and something that I think will be very special.

Sincerely,

Jason

The Boogie Bus

So, yesterday was June 16th, which is National Youth Day in South Africa. This day celebrates June 16th, 1976, when there was a youth uprising in Soweto and across SA in opposition to the apartheid government. Because its a national holiday, we didn't have class (yay!), so instead, we went to Langa to visit some of the kids from LEAP. Even though they didn't have class, they had a (optional?) cultural day where there were performances by the choir, gumboot dancers, and African dancers, followed by a speech of someone who participated in the June 16th uprisings, and then students got the chance to speak about what Youth Day means to them. The performances were all absolutely amazing! The choir was fantastic, and of course the dancers impressed. After their performance, we went to the cultural center in Langa to see more performances to celebrate the day. There were a couple of singers, poets, and then a band called AbAvuki, and they were outstanding! The lead singer had the largest vocal range I've ever head and a falsetto only rivaled by Mika. Anyways, he's singing and getting really into it so he starts dancing (of course he's a phenomenal dancer) and then he starts trying to get people from the audience to come up and dance with him. Naturally, our entire group is sitting in the front row and he keeps trying to pull people up but no one will go, so finally he asks me, and as resident better-than-average-white-boy-dancer, I actually accept and go up on stage, thinking that surely somebody will follow me. Oh wait, no one came! I was kind of mad, but really excited at the same time. So, he tells me to do the samba and I'm like ummmm... I don't know how to samba!!!! so he's like just go with it, so I did, and it was soooooo much fun!!! It completely fed my own narcissism, but I was smiling the entire time. Eventually, I got Deja to come up with me (thank God!) and we figured we'd just dance until the song was over. Little did we know it was a 10 minute song! So, we just enjoyed ourselves (at least I did) and then sat down. Well, after the performance he said that they were playing that night at Mama Africa (this really really good pan-African restaurant on Long Street), so I was like hmmmmm.... really good music, really good food, potentially good dancing; that's a tough one. So, I made reservations and 12 of us went for dinner. In need of transport I asked Nikki (one of the old IES students) for the number of a cab only to get referred to Boogie Steve (again, that's his actual name. I did not make it up). So, Boogie Steve shows up to take us away in his mid-90s van that has been pimped out with rope lights, CDs affixed to the ceiling, and a miniature disco ball, complete with seats that turn around to face backwards (seriously, can I get some of those?). Just when we thought that Boogie Steeve couldn't get more awesome, he pulls out two joints with questionable contents (we're pretty sure it's not pot) and just gives them to us. Why? Because we're Americans, and apparently we're supposed to love it. So, Boogie Steve drove us to Mama Africa, dinner was fabulous, we got to chat it up with the singer, and then we got Boogie Steve to take us to Mitchell's on the Waterfront (Mitchell's is the bar we went to on the first Tuesday we were here; it's karaoke night every Tuesday so obviously we're going to be there). Well, it was Nikki's last night at Mitchell's, so we made her sing the Shoop Shoop Song (Cher style), and then Thapz and I sang Escape by Enrique (our new song apparently). To put it in a word, the night was magical.
Anyways, we just had class today, which was mediocre as usual. We watched a movie in Anre's class, which was decent. Our other class was moderately fun, which is more than it usually is so that was a plus I suppose. Tonight, I just hang out with Nikki and have been around the house. I really really really need to start journaling!!!! Hopefully, I'll post on [side notes] tonight. Tomorrow it's Anre's class and then off to LEAP again.

Well, till then.

Jason

Real World Starts NOW

So, yesterday we got back from our safari and it was absolutely amazing We got to see all of the big five, including three female lions that were literally less than 5 feet away from our car, all roaming free in their natural habitat. We rode in two open-air safari vehicles (basically modified land rovers), waking up at 5am to get to the gates as soon as they open, riding all day (with a few restroom/lunch breaks) and then coming back for a fantastic dinner prepared by Crazy Dave (yes, he refers to himself as Crazy Dave; no, I did not make that up). We had two full days on safari and on the second day we went on a night drive (very exciting, but we didn't get to see as much as I'd hoped). We stayed in the park itself in small huts that were actually really comfortable (they had beds and sinks). There are quite a few rest stops/cafes/gift shops scattered throughout the park and a few camps ranging from tents to basic accommodations (like ours) to fairly nice rooms. The entire thing has plumbing and electricity so even though it maintains a natural environment for the animals, it keeps some of the necessities for us humans. The Kruger park is approximately the size of Israel or the state of New York. While Yellowstone used to be the largest national park, a few years ago the government of South Africa extended Kruger into Mozambique, making it the largest national park in the world. The entire thing is fenced in, but none of the wildlife is interfered with by humans, so that the animals do truly live in their natural environments. Because the animals grow up with vehicles always being there, they are simply used to them and more or less ignore them. However, you are not allowed to get out of the vehicle at any time, because as soon as the silhouette of the vehicle is broken, an animal may think it is trying to harm it and then attack the vehicle. There are 3000km of road in the Kruger park (some paved, but mostly dirt), but even if you drove down every single road in the park, you would still only see 5% of the park's land. This allows for plenty of free space for the animals to roam freely and live as they normally would. I will be sure to put pictures up in the next few days!
After leaving Kruger, we went to Soweto, the oldest township in Johannesburg. We stayed at a backpackers (hostel) and we got to do a bike tour of the township (for more on that, read my upcoming post on [sidenotes]).
After returning to Cape Town (about a two hour flight from Jo'Burg), we moved into our permanent IES housing. Eight of us, including myself, are living in a house and the other 6 are living in apartments a block away. I'm slightly concerned as to how everything will work out simply due to some of the housing arrangements, but I'm sure it will all be fine, if not a simple test of patience (which most know is not something I handle easily). So, I may just end up spending a lot of time in the apartments. The house is really nice, especially for Cape Town, and we're only a block away from campus and a few minute's walk from grocery stores, restaurants, etc. We have a washing machine, but no dryer, so line-drying would seem ideal if Cape Town didn't have the most unpredictable weather known to man (it's actually worse than St. Louis, if that was ever possible). I can definitely foresee some drama going down, both in the house and the apartments, so only time will tell. All I'm saying is that MTV should get some camera's over here because it may get a little crazy. Well, I'll keep you updated should any excitement occur, and I promise I'll get some photos up soon!

Till then,

Jason

The Waiting Room

So, last night we went back to Long Street. Apparently Monday is the Capetonians day of rest, so we went to a bar called The Waiting Room. It was a really cool, funky place and they had a live jazz band which was really fun, plus they had this cool rooftop area that was very Moulin Rouge meets South Africa. Anyways, the band finished pretty early so we went to a pool bar called Stones, played a few games, saw a hooker, and then went to a bar called Marvel. Marvel was so much fun, we ran into Thapz again (I just realized how you actually spell his name), he bought us more drinks, a shot of 480 (note: never drink it, I think its like 80% alcohol, but it tastes like drinking nail polish), and then a Savannah (second note: people here love cider, it tastes a lot better than beer, and has the same alcohol content so it's really a win-win). Marvel was also interesting because I'm pretty sure we were the only white people in the entire club, which actually made it really really fun. Tonight, we're going to Tiger Tiger. Apparently it's a really really nice club and like Prince Henry goes there when he's in town (again, it can't be that nice if they're just letting anyone in a.k.a. us, but who knows). Tomorrow, we're catching a transport at 6:45 to go to the airport (seriously, I may just not sleep tonight), then it's off to Jo'Burg for our safari in Kruger! I'm soooooooo excited. It should be the highlight of my trip. So, the next photos I post may just be of (hopefully) one of the big five (lion, rhino, buffalo, elephant, and leopard, so aptly named because they are considered the five hardest animals to hunt on foot and are now sought after on every major safari). They are incredibly difficult to spot, and you're not guaranteed to see anything so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that we'll come across at least one (I really want to see an elephant and a leopard!).

Also, one of our assignments for Anre's class is to keep a journal documenting how our attitudes, how we feel, etc. over time so that we can compare how we felt coming into this experience with how we have changed after having left. So, I've decided to create another blog called Side Notes, found at www.jgsell1.blogspot.com (creative, I know). I'm going to leave Notes on Contemplation as a sort of record of events, documenting what I'm doing, where I'm going etc., and use Side Notes as a much more personal, in-depth diary. I'm going to try my best not to edit myself or my thoughts, despite it being posted online. So, if you are someone who may not want to know my inner-most thoughts, then I honestly wouldn't read it. I would hope that no one's opinion of me would be changed after reading what I have to say and that anyone who reads it can use it as a source of reflection for their own lives and experiences. Being in South Africa, it's inevitable that you are faced with racism in both obvious and subtle forms. The discussion of racism and apartheid is not always common here, and is something many people would like to simply ignore or forget (much like slavery in America). Facing issues of discrimination face to face isn't always easy, but I think it's a critical part of being a global citizen. This includes not only racism, but homophobia, sexism, agism, classism, etc. The list really goes on and on. I think that Anre's psych class will help a lot not only to study racism, prejudice, and discrimination in others, but also to see it in myself. Side Notes isn't set up yet, but I will get on it when I return from Kruger.

Till then,

Jason

You're Gunna F*cking Love It!

So, last night like 25 or so of Moses' friends came over to the hostel already fairly intoxicated, and Tabz (I have no idea how to spell his name, but it sounds like Tabs) was screaming about how we're going to this club called Caprice and we're "GUNNA F*CKING LOVE IT." To say the least, he is my new favorite person. ever. So, we walked down the street to a couple of bars and after Tabz bought us all drinks, we crammed nine of us in to Lindizweh's (also have no idea how to spell that) tiny compact car, and drove 20 minutes to Camp's Bay (this GORGEOUS beach that is very reminiscent of L.A.). So, we get out of the car at Caprice and Tabz informs us that we need to walk in front to show that they were with us because they usually don't allow blacks into the bar. While I was a little shocked at that, it all made sense the second I walked in. This bar was probably the closest thing to a Hollywood/Beverly Hills club you can get outside of going to California. It was a ton of older (mid 30s) white, clearly really wealthy people, who continue to dress like they're in college (designer jeans, shirts that are way too low for your implanted breasts, etc.). Caprice was nice, very "posh," and we got this guy to buy all 9 of us shots, twice. But, it really wasn't that great. I think it would have been better if I was looking to make friends with other really rich white people, but seeing as that's not exactly why I came to Africa, it's not currently on the top of my to-do list. Anyways, we came home, made some frozen pizza's, reveled in how drunk Tabz was, and continued to question who this random Dutch guy was who somehow showed up in our Hostel with all of Moses' friends, and then decided to hop into our already overflowing car and join us at Caprice. So, we woke up this morning and are currently procrastinating doing our reading for our class in three hours. If I were a good student I would stop blogging, but instead I'm enjoying the fact that I am the current title holder for going out the most out of everyone in our house.

Yes, I am very proud.

Jason

Things Notre Dame Students Like #26: Day Drinking

So, we just got back from Googletu (Guguletu, but this guy had the Google shirt and it was really funny). Anyways, it was the BEST day EVER (seriously, VH1 could have had a special about it). We left around 2:30 and stayed until like 6. Pretty much we got there, bought beer and cider (Hunter's and Savannah is soooooooooo good), put in an order for 20-something people, and danced for hours waiting for our food. It's pretty much a TON of people from the townships and all around Cape Town who come out to Mzoli's (the restaurant that cooks the food), participates in the honored tradition of Day Drinking, dance all day (people in Africa appreciate dance way more than people in the States :-), and then devour the AMAZING food. After waiting for at least 2 hours, our food came in a huge bucket. We got chicken, steak, sausage, and mashed potatoes, pretty much all mixed together in a huge container. I asked Moses if we got any sort of utensils, and he was like "don't ask that question to anyone, just use your hands." So, after the food showed up we devoured it; I had three pieces of chicken and a huge steak, and after you're finished you just throw the bones on the floor. It was the messiest, tastiest, most amazing meal I've ever had. I have no idea what kind of marinade they used, but it was AMAZING (it also may have had to do with the day drinking). Anyways, we just got back to the house and it sounds like some of us will be going out tonight (half-priced sushi, half-priced drinks!), and then waking up early to do our first assignment (really? homework in Cape Town? this is a joke, right?...) So, I'll be back on tomorrow, ready to tell all about tonight. Till then,

Jason

Can't Keep My Hand Out the Cookie Jar

So, I thought that I'd just fill everyone in on exactly how cheap it is to live here. To put it simply, you could live in the nicest apartment on the Waterfront, for about how much Steve is currently paying to live in a small house in the Hollywood ghetto. Currently the conversion rate is 8 Rand to 1 USD (it peaked at 12 to 1 and it was 10 to 1 in January but the recession seems to have brought down the dollar significantly).
So, for about 10 days worth of groceries it cost me R240 ($30). Clearly, everything is super cheap, but we still haven't quite adjusted to the sticker shock. So, even though you know that you're only spending 30 bucks, when you see that you owe 240 Rand, it still feels a little suprising. A burger at a decent restaurant costs R30-R40. A decent bottle of wine costs R40-R70. Drinks at most bars are also a lot cheaper. A double rum with coke is usually about R30, a double vodka with Red Bull is like R35 (which is less than a single Red Bull at home). Jaeger bombs are R30 or R35. It's not uncommon to go out with R250 and come home with only R20 or R30, but then you realize how much you actually spent and feel a little better about yourself (and then convince yourself that you're not, in fact, a huge alcoholic). Tipping is still around 15%, but one thing that's different is that service at a sit-down restaurant is sooooooooooo slow. Adjusting to "Africa time" (like Mexican time but twice as long) has not been easy, but you eventually learn to just go with it. For those in a hurry, there are KFC and McDonald's EVERYWHERE. I don't know why people here love KFC so much, but I've been told it has to do with how cheap it is. I've been trying to avoid the American restaurants, but we did go to McDonald's once. The menu is about the same, with some slight variations. Anyways, we're off to Gugulethu for dinner. I'm sure I'll have some commentary tonight (it's homework night, so naturally I'll be looking for some reason to procrastinate). Till then,

Jason

We'll Take Two of Three

So, yesterday (Saturday) we had the pleasure of being woken up by the chatter of a few Duke and UNC students lounging around, when Caitlin knocked on my door, telling me that if I wanted to go on a wine tour, then I better be ready in 15 minutes. Apparently, the Duke/UNC students had arranged for one, and then went out really late the night before, and no one wanted to go anymore, so they invited us along. Needless to say, who are we to pass up a pre-arranged wine tour? So, we hopped on the bus to Stellenbosch, about an hour's drive away from Cape Town. South African wine is actually fairly well-known and recognized; at one point shortly after colonization, more than half of the wine drank in Britain came from South Africa. The vineywards were absolutely gorgeous, with many of the buildings still showings signs of their Dutch heritage. We went to four wineries and ended up buying two bottles of Le Bouquet, a really delicious white wine. It was really fun and a great last-minute way to fill the day. After getting back, everyone was pretty tired so most of us took naps before going out. We ended up going to Cubana, a Cuban hookah bar/restaurant/club/lounge in Green Point (sort of in between Long Street and the Waterfront) which was really nice, but super packed. So, after a few drinks we headed over to The Bronx, a moderately sketchy gay club that is about one step above Truman's in Mishawaka but still not coming close to The Complex. It turns out that Cape Town is like the San Francisco of the entire continent of Africa, and given South Africa's legalization of gay marriage following their rewriting of the constitution post-apartheid (it's still considered one of if not the most progressive constitutions in the world), it makes sense that Cape Town would become an international gay mecca.
Today, we are heading to one of the townships for a late lunch/early dinner. Apparently, many of the townships have large braais (BBQs) on Sundays with a lot of inexpensive, delicious food. So, I'm really excited to go and try what they've got! We go back to class again tomorrow and our teacher already gave us our first assignment (booooo) so it sounds like tonight we'll be staying in (my first night in since we got here). Lotte has been coming out with us and it sounds like she's having a really good time. Every time I found out something new about her I seem to be in awe of the amazingness that is her life (she hitch-hiked from London to Serbia in a week with only 15 pounds!!!!). Anyways, I hope that everyone at home is doing well. I miss you all!

Jason

So You Agree, You Think You're Really Pretty

So, yesterday was pretty much fantastic. We had our first class with Anre in the morning which was fairly interesting. In the afternoon we went to Leap College, which is a school for 8th-12th graders. Basically, they accept students from townships who demonstrate that they can handle the coursework and provide them with more opportunities than they would normally have, such as computer labs, cultural activities, smaller classes, and a supportive and encouraging environment. We are all paired one-on-one with 11th and 12th graders tutoring them, but what is interesting is that they are more concerned with us teaching them skills such as time management, studying help, etc. as opposed to just helping them do their work. They were all sooooooo nice and the girl I got was amazing and super chatty. After talking with them one-on-one for a while, we went around and watched the different cultural activities that they do. All of the students participate in one and can choose between choir, drama, gumboot dancing for boys, and traditional African dancing for girls. They were all AMAZING, especially the dancers. Some of us got to learn part of the gumboot dance which was so much fun but really tiring. After leaving LEAP we came home, hung out, went to dinner, and then went to a club called Hemisphere, on the 31st floor of some building downtown. Apparently, it used to be super exclusive and Leonardo DiCaprio went there, but obviously it's not anymore if they let a bunch of young Americans in. At first, it was a little slow, but of course we ended up having a fabulous time. There's definitely some Real World style drama that's starting and I really hope progresses.
Today, we had our first sociology class with a South African prof. She's really nice but she speaks really slowly, which isn't the best for a bunch of jet-lagged kids. I'm thinking that her class will be pretty good, but she seems to have a lot of assignments for us, which is really not ideal. At least Anre has no homework for us except for journaling. After class we went to the bank, and then got this huge sandwich called a Gatsby which is a poor-man's meal, in that it is fries, chicken, and lettuce sandwiched between a huge loaf of bread and sliced for four people. It was really messy and we all know that I don't do messy food very well, but after all the fries fell out I just ate them. Also, we met this fabulous girl named Lotte (Charlotte) from London who is living with us in the hostel. Apparently, she is a psychiatry med student who is doing work abroad for two months and doesn't know a person in Cape Town, which I was like WTF, I'm not sure if you're really brave, adventurous, or just crazy, but in any case we're like best friends and she will definitely be going out with us tonight! I can't imagine being in her position, her first day in a completely different city and not knowing a soul, so I'm going to do everything to make sure that she feels like she's welcome and she can always go out with us (plus, who doesn't love a good British friend, right?!?). I see a great friendship blossoming so who knows where this will go ;-). Tonight, Moses is taking us to a hookah bar for smoking and drinks and then we're going to Long Street which is a street downtown with TONS of clubs and bars and restaurants so I think after dinner we're going club hopping, so I predict it will be really fun. Anyways, it's our first weekend so I'm sure it will be a little crazy (just a little). Till then,

Jason

The Beauty in Ugly

So, today we went on a Township tour of Langa and Gugelethu, the first and second oldest townships in Cape Town, respectively. It's hard to describe them without witnessing them first hand, but the easiest way to describe them is simply that they are large, race-demarcated ghettos, but the housing varies greatly from township to township and within each township. In Langa, you can find hundreds of shacks (small wood or corrugated metal huts), old homes that have been inhabited by generations of families, all the way to brand new government built apartments and town-homes. While parts of the townships definitely reminded me of the villages in Nicaragua, there was definitely a different feel to them. While the people and villages in Nica generally didn't have any job or source of income, these people do have jobs and cars and homes. They weren't made out of desperation or necessity, like the ones in Nica were. Rather, they were made purely to separate the races, and "naturally" the economic divisions grew. So, there are people who live in the Townships who are actually rather wealthy (comparatively speaking), but continue to live there because that is where they have always lived. Our tour guide (who is amazing by the way) compared it to celebrities today who come from poor neighborhoods, and even after achieving fame go back because of pride for where they are from. It was really amazing to both hear some of the stories of people from the townships and go on to be incredibly successful, but it was also very moving to see some of the worst living conditions first-hand. I think what made it the most difficult was that in Nica you see terrible conditions, but it seems like everyone is more or less in the same situation. Here, however, there are a lot of incredibly wealthy people in Cape Town. It is a very developed city, and South Africa has by far the strongest economy in Africa, despite not having any oil. Yet, there is still so much poverty left as a result of apartheid. I have to wonder how people who live here can simply overlook it, but, like so many things, when you're constantly surrounded by something, whether it be a beautiful mountain, or vast poverty, you simply stop noticing it.Well, everyone seems to be really exhausted so I'm probably going to get to bed early. My roommate already moved out (that was quick!), so I have my room back to myself (yay!). Tomorrow, we start our first class with Anre and then in the afternoon we're visiting Leap College, but I'll tell you all about it tomorrow. Till then,

Good night!

Jason

Passing the Torch

So, we went to this really great pizza place for dinner that is like a five minute walk away. Apparently, our hostel is in this really Bohemian part of town called Observatory (or Obz for short) and there are a ton of UCT medical students who live around here, since the hospital is only a ten minute walk away. So, just three blocks down is a popular street with a lot of restaurants and cafes and clubs, which we have definitely been utilizing. Tonight, Moses told us that we absolutely had to go to this bar for karaoke night, and it would be a karaoke battle between the old IES students who have been studying abroad this past semester (IES is the organization that runs study abroad programs all over the world, and the students here this semester are just finishing up "writing exams") and us newbies. Well, there wasn't much of a competition; they pretty much blew us out of the water, both with their singing abilities and their drinking abilities, but I definitely held my own on the dance floor (Single Ladies anyone?) Anyways, it was sooooooo much fun. I pretty much made besties with on of the IES girls who's graduating, and, as she has been going to this bar for karaoke night every week for the last six months, we decided that they would pass the IES torch and it is now our new tradition to go there every Tuesday for the next six weeks. Well, we just got back and I'm exhausted, so I'm off to bed (I really hope Nate doesn't snore, I don't need another roommate who snores). Tomorrow, we're doing our second day of orientation and we get to go into some of the townships (more or less large, race-segregated ghettos that still remain as a result of apartheid) so I'm a little nervous but really excited to see how everyone interacts. I'm off to bed, so, till then.

Jason

The Blue Devils

So, I just got a roommate, even though he wasn't supposed to come until tomorrow. There's a group of kids from Duke and UNC who are staying here for six weeks doing service. His name is Nate and he seems really nice, just a little shy, but I have no doubts we'll get him out of his shell! Plus there's this really awesome kid who's from England, but goes to UNC, and is now in Cape Town, and his accent is amazing! Today, we had our first day of orientation, so we pretty much heard a ton of talks about being safe, and heard all of these horror stories, as they frequently reminded us that they're "not trying to scare us," but if you ask me they did a pretty bad jo. Then we went on like a four hour tour of the Cape peninsula, saw some African penguins (sooooooo cute!) and then went to the Cape of Good Hope and the Cape Point, which was believed to be where the two oceans (Atlantic and Indian) met and the point furthest south in Africa, but there is actually a point further south, so it's been renamed as the point furthest south-west, which I guess is still pretty impressive. Anyways, it was GORGEOUS and I've decided that this is by far, hands down, the most naturally beautiful city I've been to, and I consider myself fairly well traveled. Tonight, I think we're going out to a Karaoke bar, so I'll be sure to give the details! Till then,

Jason

P.S. I'll try to put up pics soon.

Cape Town, We Have a Problem

So, I just realized that my plug adapter doesn't fit. Apparently when Samsonite claims that it fits "parts of South Africa," that doesn't include the only part that matters. :-( It's a good thing I'm living with 13 other people.

The First Day

So, Caitlin and I landed in Cape Town around 9am local time and we got to the hostel (we're staying here for the week and then we'll be moving into a house and two apartments). Everyone slowly arrived throughout the day two by two, in typical Real World fashion. We've decided that this is the new Real World Cape Town and that there better be drama, as long as I'm not involved. Moses, one of our RA's is here, and he took us on a tour of the city. We're about a 15 minute bus ride away from downtown Cape Town. It's a moderately sized downtown area, there's the typical shopping area, business district, club street, etc. Many of the buildings have a very European colonial feel to them and walking around the city definitely reminds you of a European city, with the exception of markets selling small statues of elephants and giraffes. We also went to the Victoria & Alfred Waterfront, which is basically a huge mall and a ton of restaurants on the waterfront. The mall definitely had a Diesel store, which was really tempting, but I resisted (plus the prices were like identical to home so it's not even a good deal :-(). I was so exhausted that by the time we came back I had to take a nap, but then we went out to dinner and then came back. Now that everyone's here most of us have just been hanging out and getting to know each other. Fortunately, it hasn't been awkward at all. Everyone seems to be getting along well and I think its going to be an amazing group. I'm not sure if it's a blessing or a curse, but there are only two guys on the trip, with 12 girls, so I guess that just means that I'll be going out a lot. Anyways, I'm rather exhausted. We have orientation tomorrow which starts at 8:30 (uggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!). So, I'm going to bed, even though it's currently 4:45 at home. Good night!

Jason